Rules for the Modern Wedding: There are None

"Modern weddings are all about individuality," says Theresa DiMasi, editor in chief of Brides.com. "If a bride wants to involve lots of friends and family, it's absolutely her choice.

I just came across this article about big wedding parties. The quote above stresses what I’ve been trying to explain to our families since announcing who we asked to stand up in our wedding party, although we stayed within some boundaries compared to these couples. While we do have a large wedding party and it seems daunting sometimes when we think about it, we also realize that everyone we asked is so helpful, talented and easy-going that nothing will be a problem.

Most importantly, we know our wedding day is going to be a blast since we'll be surrounded by these people who we love and respect so much, and who keep us laughing in good and bad situations.

In keeping with the no-rules modern wedding, the Gavra wedding includes 7 bridesmaids, 8 groomsmen, 2 flower girls and 2 ring bearers. Two of our bridesmaids are maids of honor.

To ask them, we each did a little something personal depending on the audience. For our siblings (in-law too!), we asked them directly. We’re not sure why, but they all seemed really surprised we were asking! Happily, they were all excited too and continually ask how they can help.

For the groomsmen, Gavin wrote most of they guys a letter explaining how much their friendship means to him, leading up to asking them to be in the wedding and explaining that we couldn't imagine it without them there. They were GOOD letters. I teared up at just the couple I read. (I also cry at commercials... but these were good letters!) When it was more appropriate, he just asked.

I’ve also known most of bridesmaids for a long time, and as everyone knows am an avid picture taker in any setting. I put together a book for each girl with pictures of us throughout our relationships. Under each picture was the date when it was taken. The last page of the book was dated April 14, 2007 under a picture-sized box asking them to be a bridesmaid. DIY fun!